2 Samuel 1-3
Ch 1
In lament, David ripped his clothes to ribbons. All the men with him did the same. They wept and fasted the rest of the day, grieving the death of Saul and his son Jonathan, and also the army of God and the nation Israel, victims in a failed battle.
David and his men wept. They wept for Saul… the man out to kill David, They wept for Jonathan, David’s friend that chose to stay loyal to those out to destroy David… and they wept for the army of God, victims in a failed battle.
This struck my heart strongly today.
It made me ask myself a question, that was humbling to answer.
How many times have I wept for… mourned for something other than what affected me?
Has there ever been a time that I have mourned for those who have come against me?
Have I ever mourned for those that were friends yet chose to stand by those who wounded me?
Has there ever been a time that I have mourned for those warriors in the army of God who have fallen victim in a failed battle?
The focus of my heart has to change. I must look at those who have come against me and mourn for them… mourn for the fact that they have listened to a lie instead of seeking the truth… that they have walked away from what God was longing to show them to heal the very thing that they were seeking deliverance from… That they chose safety instead of living.
Soothing Psalms
Psalms 91:1
He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I know like David, I am not to return to the relationships that were unhealthy and damaging. I know that if I did there would be certain death. But there is something to be said for the choice to hide under the shelter of his wings instead of behind the wall of pain.
When I hide behind the wall of pain it locks me away from everything and everyone. The only thing that is able to penetrate the wall is the flight of fight instinct that drove me there in the first place. I live with brick and mortar in hand, in breathless pain and debilitating numbness waiting for the next shoe to be dropped so the wall can be built higher.
Yet when I hide under the shelter of the Most High. It is then that I am closest to his heart. The storms of life can rage around me and yet there is nothing but safety. As I am there under his wings my heart learns to beat in rhythm with his and there is rest!
It is here in this rhythm that I learn to mourn for those who have walked away. Not from me, but from God. I can mourn the fact that they have chosen the old safe way of doing things and live in the perpetual “look at me” state to get their affirmation instead of experiencing the true adventure God has designed them for. I can mourn for those in the Army of God who have fallen victim to the enemy’s plan to divide and conquer. And lastly I can mourn those whom in the past I have called friend and have chosen to stand with those whose only thought was destruction.
Lord,
Thank you, thank you for showing me a tender side of you. Thank you for finding me hiding behind my walls of pain and bringing me to true safety under the shadow of your wing. Thank you for holding me close enough to hear the rhythm of your heart’s beat and giving me the opportunity of re-tuning the beat of my heart to be in sync with yours.
Saturday, August 20, 2011
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
At His feet
Ruth is one of my favorite books of the bible. The story of a young widow, leaving all that she is comfortable with to follow after a God she barely knows.
Naomi and Ruth find themselves back in Naomi’s home town. Naomi is devastated by what life has brought her… the death of not only her husband, but her two sons as well.
In a time when women were not allowed to “fend for themselves,” the loss of all the males in the family brought on additional hardship.
Ruth steps up and decides to put herself at risk and glean in the fields. Picking up the scraps that the harvesters have left behind.
Boaz notices the commitment of this young girl to her mother in law and how hard she works and gives her special privileges.
Later Ruth offers herself at the feet of Boaz and becomes his wife… the mother of Jesse, the great grandmother of David.
Soothing Psalms
Psalms 83:18
May they know that you alone—whose name is Yahweh—are the Most High over all the earth!
The Lord works in amazing way and can change the course of any human plan. Be patient and trust him, because his vindication is coming.
This brings me peace… The story of Ruth reminds me that my hard work and commitment to those I love have not gone unnoticed. As I continue to offer myself at the feet of Jesus he will cover me and protect me. He does indeed work in amazing ways and can change the course of any human plan in an instant.
We never really know the outcome of our actions, but we can be sure that if they are placed at the feet of our savior they will be made to be more than we could ever hope or imagine.
Naomi and Ruth find themselves back in Naomi’s home town. Naomi is devastated by what life has brought her… the death of not only her husband, but her two sons as well.
In a time when women were not allowed to “fend for themselves,” the loss of all the males in the family brought on additional hardship.
Ruth steps up and decides to put herself at risk and glean in the fields. Picking up the scraps that the harvesters have left behind.
Boaz notices the commitment of this young girl to her mother in law and how hard she works and gives her special privileges.
Later Ruth offers herself at the feet of Boaz and becomes his wife… the mother of Jesse, the great grandmother of David.
Soothing Psalms
Psalms 83:18
May they know that you alone—whose name is Yahweh—are the Most High over all the earth!
The Lord works in amazing way and can change the course of any human plan. Be patient and trust him, because his vindication is coming.
This brings me peace… The story of Ruth reminds me that my hard work and commitment to those I love have not gone unnoticed. As I continue to offer myself at the feet of Jesus he will cover me and protect me. He does indeed work in amazing ways and can change the course of any human plan in an instant.
We never really know the outcome of our actions, but we can be sure that if they are placed at the feet of our savior they will be made to be more than we could ever hope or imagine.
Thursday, August 4, 2011
You want me to do WHAT?
Soothing Psalms
Ps 78:37-39
“Their hearts were not really loyal to God… Still God was merciful… He remembered that they were only human, like a wind that blows and does not come back”
Judges Ch 6
One day the angel of God…came to Gideon and said “God is with you, O mighty warrior!”
Gideon replied, “ With me, my master? If God is with us, why has all this happened to us? Where are all the miracle-wonders our parents and grandparents told us about, telling us, “Didn’t God deliver us from Egypt?’ The fact is, God has nothing to do with us—he has turned us over to Midian.”
But God faced him directly: “Go in this strength that is yours. Save Israel from Midian. Haven’t I just sent you?”
Gideon said to him, me, my master? How and with what could I ever save Israel? Look at me, my clan’s the weakest in Manasseh and I’m the runt of the litter.”
God said to him. “I’ll be with you . Believe me, you’ll defeat Midian as one man.”
Gideon said, “If you’re serious about this , do me a favor: Give me a sign to back up what you’re telling me. Don’t leave until I come back and bring you my gift.”
I love the story of Gideon. His country is devastated. They are living eyeball deep in the choices that they made, and it has caused them to question God. (How very much like me… My choices leading me to question God)
Their enemy is ravaging them to the point that they have NOTHING! Like grains of sand, everything they try to grasp at slips through their fingers leaving them empty and afraid.
This is where the angel of God finds Gideon… Hiding out in the wine press threshing wheat.
Trying desperately to steal away to scrounge up a small meager meal.
Yet the angel of God calls him “Mighty Warrior” and commissions him for duty. He tells him to tear down the Baal idols that have been set up and to offer a sacrifice to God on the alter.
Gideon’s response… If you are really sent by God…. Wait here while I go get you something to eat. What does he make… Stew! Not a quick go grab something; but something that takes time. (I can imagine he was hoping when he returned that the angel of God would be tired of waiting, or that this was all some sort of bad dream and would be gone)
He wasn’t!
So reluctantly Gideon obeyed the command of the angel and tore down his father’s alter of Baal and offered sacrifices to God… In the middle of the night, bringing along 10 men, so that nobody would know that it was him.
But they found out!
Here Gideon is pumped! And in his zeal blows his rams horn… calling out his enemy to a fight.
Other’s respond to the battle cry!
Then the reality of what is about to happen sets in and again Gideon sets out a test for God… (two in fact, just incase there is some sort of fluke the first time)
God answers… then cuts Gideon’s men from 30 companies… to 300 men!
I am sure at this point there was probably a great deal of reluctance and nervousness on Gideon’s part!
God then uses Gideon to destroy the enemy!
I love the story of Gideon… why because he is so much like me.
I find myself eyeball deep in the choices I’ve made, grasping at the sand that keeps slipping through my fingers… hiding out from my enemy trying to eek by with just enough to calm the rumbling of my stomach when God finds me, looks me in the eye, and calls me Mighty Warrior!
He knows my fears that tend to consume me, and is patient in meeting my needs… all the time building my courage for the battle that lies ahead.
God uses ordinary everyday people to do his extraordinary work. And it will never cease to amaze me! Why? Because he remembers who I am… just like I remember… all my failures, all my wrong choices… all my stupid mistakes… all my fears… yet He chooses to love me… to use me and to call me by who he has created me to be… A Mighty Warrior used for the King of Kings!
Ps 78:37-39
“Their hearts were not really loyal to God… Still God was merciful… He remembered that they were only human, like a wind that blows and does not come back”
Judges Ch 6
One day the angel of God…came to Gideon and said “God is with you, O mighty warrior!”
Gideon replied, “ With me, my master? If God is with us, why has all this happened to us? Where are all the miracle-wonders our parents and grandparents told us about, telling us, “Didn’t God deliver us from Egypt?’ The fact is, God has nothing to do with us—he has turned us over to Midian.”
But God faced him directly: “Go in this strength that is yours. Save Israel from Midian. Haven’t I just sent you?”
Gideon said to him, me, my master? How and with what could I ever save Israel? Look at me, my clan’s the weakest in Manasseh and I’m the runt of the litter.”
God said to him. “I’ll be with you . Believe me, you’ll defeat Midian as one man.”
Gideon said, “If you’re serious about this , do me a favor: Give me a sign to back up what you’re telling me. Don’t leave until I come back and bring you my gift.”
I love the story of Gideon. His country is devastated. They are living eyeball deep in the choices that they made, and it has caused them to question God. (How very much like me… My choices leading me to question God)
Their enemy is ravaging them to the point that they have NOTHING! Like grains of sand, everything they try to grasp at slips through their fingers leaving them empty and afraid.
This is where the angel of God finds Gideon… Hiding out in the wine press threshing wheat.
Trying desperately to steal away to scrounge up a small meager meal.
Yet the angel of God calls him “Mighty Warrior” and commissions him for duty. He tells him to tear down the Baal idols that have been set up and to offer a sacrifice to God on the alter.
Gideon’s response… If you are really sent by God…. Wait here while I go get you something to eat. What does he make… Stew! Not a quick go grab something; but something that takes time. (I can imagine he was hoping when he returned that the angel of God would be tired of waiting, or that this was all some sort of bad dream and would be gone)
He wasn’t!
So reluctantly Gideon obeyed the command of the angel and tore down his father’s alter of Baal and offered sacrifices to God… In the middle of the night, bringing along 10 men, so that nobody would know that it was him.
But they found out!
Here Gideon is pumped! And in his zeal blows his rams horn… calling out his enemy to a fight.
Other’s respond to the battle cry!
Then the reality of what is about to happen sets in and again Gideon sets out a test for God… (two in fact, just incase there is some sort of fluke the first time)
God answers… then cuts Gideon’s men from 30 companies… to 300 men!
I am sure at this point there was probably a great deal of reluctance and nervousness on Gideon’s part!
God then uses Gideon to destroy the enemy!
I love the story of Gideon… why because he is so much like me.
I find myself eyeball deep in the choices I’ve made, grasping at the sand that keeps slipping through my fingers… hiding out from my enemy trying to eek by with just enough to calm the rumbling of my stomach when God finds me, looks me in the eye, and calls me Mighty Warrior!
He knows my fears that tend to consume me, and is patient in meeting my needs… all the time building my courage for the battle that lies ahead.
God uses ordinary everyday people to do his extraordinary work. And it will never cease to amaze me! Why? Because he remembers who I am… just like I remember… all my failures, all my wrong choices… all my stupid mistakes… all my fears… yet He chooses to love me… to use me and to call me by who he has created me to be… A Mighty Warrior used for the King of Kings!
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